The Cialdini Effect – Influence, NLP & Persuasion

For those who don’t know Robert Cialdini Ph.D., he is the Regents professor at Arizona State University.

His books, Influence: the Psychology of Persuasion and Influence: Science and Practice, are the results of years of study into the reasons that people comply with requests in business settings. Together they have sold almost one half million copies in nine languages and consistently rank within the top one percent of books sold on In the field of Influence and persuasion, Dr. Cialdini is the most cited social psychologist in the world today.

One of Cialdini’s principles is the Law of Reciprocation

When a person receives a gift they generally feel obligated to reciprocate.

The law says that we should try to repay in kind, what another person has provided us.

In this article I’ll show you had to utilize the Law of Reciprocation.

I was talking to a waitress in one of my favorite restaurants recently, and we got on to discussing tips.

Obviously tips are very important a waitress, and it was quite apparent that some of the waitresses in this restaurant where receiving better tips than others. It reminded me of the study I read about a few years ago so I suggested this strategy, which utilizes the law reciprocation…

Sweeten the bill!

When a person receives a gift they generally feel obligated to reciprocate.

David Strohmetz and his colleagues from Monmouth University tested this expectation in two studies.

The first study conducted in Ithaca, New York, found that giving customers fancy chocolates increased tips from 15 percent of the bill to 18 percent of the bill.

The second study conducted in New Jersey found that gifts of Hershey assorted miniature chocolates also increased tips.

When no chocolate was given the average tip is 19% of the bill

However the highest tips were received when the server gave diners one piece of chocolate for person then spontaneously offered them a second piece per person the average tip was then 23% of the bill

I’m going out for dinner there next week, I’ll let you know how her tips are going!

The Persuasion Skills Power Tip

Obviously are not all going to go round and give everyone you meet a chocolate, however you can nonetheless utilize the law reciprocation.

Gifts do not need to be physical objects that are exchanged between people. Some of the most valuable gifts a person can give are intangible:






Cheerfulness and attention

These are all valuable gifts…

Being the first the give and allows you to start to maintain relationships.

According to the work of Cialdini the reciprocity rule applies, even if the recipient does not like the person who gave the gift.

Most of us find it highly disagreeable to be in a state of obligation. No one likes to feel indebted and we’ll gladly return the favor.

According to sociologists and anthropologists the Law of Reciprocation is one of the most widespread and basic norms of human culture.

Reciprocal arrangements are vital in human social systems, over thousands of years we have been conditioned to feel uncomfortable when beholden.

This sense of future obligation makes possible the development of various kinds of continuing relationships, transactions and exchanges that are beneficial to society.

Reciprocity applies to concessions too.

One of the most effective ways to use the reciprocity rule is to start with an extreme request that is sure to be rejected, you can then profitably retrieved too small request [the one that was desired all along] which is likely to be excepted because it appears to be a concession.

How to amplify the Law of reciprocation

If your initiating favor is significant, personal and unexpected the recipient is much more likely to respond in kind/provide an even bigger favor.

Time one of the biggest gifts of all

I always ensure that with everyone I meet I let them know that my time is precious…

I will fit someone in as a favor…This also initiates the law of scarcity, but you’ll have to wait until next time for more information on how to utilize that powerful law…

For more information about Cialdini’s work I suggest you check out

“Influence: Science and Practice by Robert B. Cialdini

That’s all for now

Source by Marc Hogan